Saturday, July 21, 2012

Existentialist: The Surreal, Sublime, and Absurd in the NBA

Mix a dab of Kierkegaard, a sliver of Sartre, a pinch of Camus, a bit of Hollinger, and a dose of Chappelle, and what do you get? You get the debut feature of the "Existentialist." Henry David Thoreau once said, "it is not what you look at, but what you see." And the truth is definitely stranger than fiction. This new feature column of NBA RAW evolves around some of the surreal, sublime, and absurd goings-on in the NBA.


Existentialist July 22, 2012



Savvy.... big-picture thinker.....vision... and a real winner, are all terms you will never see in the same paragraph with Jim Dolan.


Lebron had the now infamous, "The Decision." Dwight Howard is working on "The Indecision." It has even given birth to a new noun, "the Dwight." Translation: perpetual waffling, insufferable indecision, constant whining, and a light bulb that does not shine too bright. Next time you are working on a office deadline, you can tell a colleague, "don't do a Dwight on me."

Not to feel left out in Houston, Jeremy Lin has the "Bad Decision." Really Jeremy, let's get this right, you spent four years at Harvard... you are not a coddled 18-year old AAU savant.... and you really thought the paranoid evangelist of organizational loyalty, hater of all independent thinking, and creator or the MSG gulag media policy was really going to fall for the okey-doke? There is a term for that thinking Jeremy-delusional.

Memo to J. Lin's new agent Jim Tanner, does he get a discount for your bad advice?  Come on Jim, was it really worth the extra $ 5 million on the back end to wind up in Houston? Who's advising you Karl Rove?

Kudos to J.R. Smith for having the honesty to verbalize what was in minds of many  Knick teammates. Smith mentioned to ESPN, many teammates may take Lin's bloated contract personally because many have been doing it longer, and have not received any reward for it. People incidentally like J.R. Smith.

Hey Carmelo, what's more ridiculous, J. Lin's contract, or your inability to see your iso-heavy, ball-stopping, defensively-deficient style of hero-ball is the real culprit behind the Knick chemistry meltdown. Franchise players ELEVATE the skill-sets of their supporting casts. Its called "winning ball."

Amare, championship or bust this year huh?  Are you angling for the Ewing award? That is our annual award given for empty guarantees.

The NBA says advertisements will appear on player uniforms in 2013-2014. I will settle for better officiating. How about you?

Nice bounce back for the Denver Nuggets. The Nuggets have a tantalizing mix of young talent-especially the recent re-signing of center JaVale McGee. They are a tier-one star away from being an elite team. They  now have to dig in on defensive end  because the offense is there. Watch out for the boys in Mile High.

Sorry Knick fans, hate to kick you when your down, but the best team in NYC maybe in Brooklyn. They have superior symmetry, better complimentary balance, an owner that gets it, and the best back court in the game-yes that includes Kobe and Nash. If they do land Dwight, switch jerseys.

Dear Rob (as in Hennigan, new Magic GM)... eye rolls please.....there is such a thing as paralysis by over-analysis. You do NOT have the leverage you think.Dwight is going-as he he won't be on your team. Make the best deal you can, learn from some of the the bad rooster moves made by your predecessor, Otis Smith, and move on. Your Dwightmare will soon pass.

PS Rob, isn't the goal NOT to replicate the bad signings  made by Otis my man? Well, giving a 30-year old point guard who can't defend, is not exactly adept at reading defenses or attacking matchups a 3-year $ 19.7 million contract is how can I say this politely...... a dumb move! Sorry Jameer

This just in, Sarah Palin says Dwight  Howard waffles to much.





No comments:

Post a Comment